Last Day of Work

Today is the last day of school! I am so sad! Yesterday I subbed a fifth grade class. I got to go to the "black top" and watch them all get their yearbooks signed. It was fun to see them interact with each other, to see who was really popular, to watch them be nice to the kids with disabilities, it was a fun day!! I even felt like a celebrity-I probably signed 30 random kids yearbooks and t-shirts. My favorite kids were the ones who came up and asked me to sign it-and when I signed, "Mrs. Tew" they look surprised and said, "What? You're a teacher?? I thought you were a kid or some one's daughter!" I almost bought my own yearbook so I could walk around with them.

I will miss being around so many kids and their silly antics, their dramatic tales of life in high school, having sudden headaches and tummy aches when they realize there is a test, thinking they're sneaky pulling their headphones through their hoody so they can listen to music (I was that age too, doofus! Here's a tip-TURN IT DOWN), thinking they're sneaky texting each other under the desk, being bored with them and ordering take out, being told by kinder gardeners that I am prettier than their cat, getting asked out by boys from 2nd grade to 12th, helping them unlock their phones, taking votes, having debates about politics and the French, talking to random girls for hours about their boyfriends, curling their hair while we talk, discussing drugs, alcohol and their futures, the list goes on and on.

But most especially, making their lives miserable by giving them EXTREMELY difficult assignments for the 45 minutes I have them in my class, without any kind of lesson plans. These were some of my favorite essays:"My most memorable memory of my 9th grade year is when I had to write a pointless half page essay about my most memorable memory. In a class that has nothing to do with writing, three days before the end of school. It was June 1, 2009 when I walked into my health class. After the bell rang the sub told us that we were writing an essay about our most memorable memory. I'm pretty sure this is not on the lesson plan. Regardless, I spent five minutes writing a dumb essay about writing a dumb essay, which in my opinion is a huge waste of class time." (You're telling me-at least you had your Ipod to listen to-I had to babysit you guys!)

"My most memorable moment this year in the 9th grade is probably one of my best moments I've had in a while. My most memorable moment is Tuesday of last week when I was got brand new socks! They felt really good on my feet and made me extremely comfortable, and still do! These socks are so comfortable I think I will go out and buy some more today. This may seem like a joke to you, but it is not, these socks really made my week and I will keep them forever or until they go bad. The end!!!""My most memorable moment happened officially today in first period when I saw the most beautiful sub I have ever seen in my life. It changed my life completely. It is now a half page. It is now a half page. It is now a half page. It is now a half page. It is now a half page. It is now a half page. PS (Leaves his phone number) Will you marry me?"

"One bright Saturday morning, birds chirping, a sun ray creeps through my blinds. I jumped out of bed and roundhouse kicked it. I fall asleep for another two hours. Today was the Tenko Buyon Big Junty fighting tournament. I was greeted by the curator of the tournament. I was fighting through the tournament, first ninjas, then finally Chuck Norris."